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By Darlin Tillery
Life & Trends Reporter
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An employee has turned online for advice about their personal and professional dilemma involving an expectation from family for help landing a job interview.
Reddit user LilTomatillo13 explained that they work at a large organization that regularly takes on interns and over the years they’ve helped several nieces and nephews secure interviews.
These interviews are not guarantees of a job, the original poster (OP) clarified, only a way to get into the consideration pool. But when a sister-in-law requested the same for her son, Eric, the OP hesitated.
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'The bare minimum'
According to LilTomatillo13, Eric only reached out after being prompted by his mother. When they finally spoke, Eric showed little initiative and used slang like “bruh” and “fam” while struggling to explain why he even wanted the internship.
Sensing a lack of maturity and direction, the OP asked Eric to write a short note explaining his interest and what he hoped to gain from the experience. What came back, they say, was clearly generated by artificial intelligence.
“I told him that I could not put in a good word for him because he could not even do the bare minimum,” the OP explained to fellow Redditors.
The reaction was swift and intense.
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Eric accusing them of being unfair and his mom arguing that the digital age had changed what’s expected of young applicants.
Even the OP's brother pushed back, saying that Eric had “struggled during the pandemic, the academic landscape has changed, and he needs someone to give him a chance to show what he can do.”
However, many critics on Reddit didn’t buy that argument, amid more than 300 comments.
“You just gave him that chance. He did not rise to the occasion,” one pointed out.
Another agreed, stating, "He didn't put in the effort to even ask you for the interview. My initial advice was just to get him the interview to let him mess it up himself, but you have to think about how that would reflect onto your professional career.”
Mixing Business with Family
Concerns about mixing family with employment are common and some professionals urge caution when offering job opportunities to relatives.
In a piece on LinkedIn, career coach Melissa Llarena noted that while family and friends can be a strong part of a job search network, “don’t assume the contacts of your family and friends are your contacts.”
She added, “Giving them a heads-up is the courteous thing to do, but they may also provide suggestions on the best way to communicate with their contacts."
'Follow your hiring funnel'
Nancy Henriquez, writing in her guide on hiring relatives, emphasized the importance of treating family hires like any other candidate.
“Follow your hiring funnel (NO MATTER WHAT!),” she wrote.
“Family members should fill out an application just like everyone else and follow the same interviewing process etc. This shows your non-family employees that you mean business and no special treatment is needed."
The OP said they had considered getting Eric the interview anyway, just to show how unprepared he was. But in the end, they decided against it, concerned about their own reputation and the potential consequences of endorsing someone who wasn’t ready
“I asked him, point blank, WHY do you want this internship? ‘I dunno'," the OP recounted.
That was enough to make up their mind.
Newsweek has reached out to LilTomatillo13 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.
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