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By Lucy Notarantonio
Senior Reporter
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A woman was inspired to share an important message on TikTok following a compliment from a stranger.
Newsweek spoke to Caren DeCesaris, 31, (@caren_decesaris) who recorded the video straight after the interaction whilst continuing to walk around the grocery store. The video quickly went viral, racking up over 680,000 views.
During the December 9 clip, DeCesaris, who lives in Raleigh, North Carolina, said that a woman stopped her to say she "loves" her nose. A feature that DeCesaris is proud of, however, it hasn't always been that way.
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She told Newsweek: "When I was in third grade, I was made fun of for my nose a lot. I had told my mom earlier in those elementary years that I wanted a nose job. But somewhere along the way, that desire faded away, and I really began to love my nose.
"I just feel like a beautiful European queen! I describe mine as 'the Roman nose.'"
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DeCesaris asks people who are insecure about their nose, the following question: "Do you not like it because you feel like you should not like it based on what other people think or what the world says? Or do you not like it because you don't like it?"
She explains that many people have never truly considered whether they genuinely dislike their nose. Reassuringly, she says, "it is powerful, it is beautiful, [and] it is amazing." She then reminds her audience that embracing and owning their features will naturally enhance their beauty.
She concludes by stating that this principle applies to everyone and is not limited to noses—it could be acne, height, or any other perceived insecurity. Whatever the issue, she encourages people to hold their head high and confidently "own it."
The creative artist told Newsweek that she often shares content aimed to help people embrace their unique features.
"I see comments from people saying they dislike a feature because they feel others are staring at them," she said. "I like to remind, that this perception is often our own—and just as easily as we assume someone is judging us, it's just as likely they're admiring us instead! This message is so close to my heart. Above all, I want to reflect and remind others of their beauty and the true perfection of who they are."
Social Media Comparisons and Body Image
While DeCesaris is using her platform to encourage self-love and acceptance, this isn't always the case for all users.
A study by the Department of Psychology at York University, Toronto, published in March 2021, explored how young women's perfectionism about their appearance influences their body image when comparing themselves to idealized images on social media. Female college students were assigned to either compare their body parts to those of attractive Instagram models or view neutral images.
The study found that comparisons to Instagram models led to reduced confidence and increased dissatisfaction with appearance and weight. Women with high levels of perfectionism about their looks experienced even worse outcomes, with heightened dissatisfaction and lower confidence. This was linked to negative thought patterns, such as overthinking (rumination) and imagining worst-case scenarios (catastrophizing).
These findings highlight the role of perfectionism and negative thinking in how social media affects body image, pointing to potential areas for therapeutic interventions.
'I'm a Millennial'
With ever-changing beauty standards and the widespread use of filters that distort appearances, it may not come as a surprise that Gen Z struggles with insecurities.
A 2018 study by Kaspersky Lab, in collaboration with Censuswide, found that girls aged 13 to 23 are more impacted by appearance-related insecurities and anxiety than boys. Among the 1,003 U.K.-based respondents surveyed, over half (56 percent) of female Gen Z participants reported feeling anxious about their looks, compared to 33 percent of males.
DeCesaris said: "I'm a millennial, so I don't know exactly what it's like to grow up in a world where social media has existed since a very young age, but I do know that beauty standards, trends, and subconscious 'expectations' are very different, given how easily we can access and see other worlds."
"Often, boys/men are left out of these conversations and also struggle with comparison and judgment. They often feel the need to conceal these feelings to fit a 'masculine' ideal. I want to give them a voice as well—we are all human, and we all deal with human things."
TikTok Reacts
So far, the video has more than 45,000 likes and almost 2,000 comments.
"I have a Roman nose (being half Italian and half Spanish). I think it adds character," said one user and another agreed: "I always say that our noses are the parts of our faces that make us most unique!! I don't have a small nose either and I love it."
A third commenter said: "I didn't care about my nose until I downloaded TikTok [and] everyone on here seems to have a perfect nose, chin [and] skin."
Offering a new perspective, a fourth commenter wrote: "I used to hate my nose. Growing up I was told it was 'big.' Now in a world of copy and paste noses, I have fallen in love with unique noses. The more unique the nose the more beautiful."
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