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A successful dating profile may have less to do with polished photos or witty one‑liners and more to do with storytelling, according to new psychological research.
In a new study, psychologists from Israel's Reichman University found that dating profiles written in a narrative, story‑based style sparked significantly greater empathy and romantic interest than more factual, list‑style profiles.
The researchers argue that profiles which read like short personal stories help potential matches feel emotionally connected, making the person behind the profile seem more authentic and appealing.
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Rather than listing traits or hobbies in isolation, weaving experiences into a narrative allows readers to imagine what it might be like to know—or date—the person.
“We are fascinated by stories, yet we write our dating profiles like shopping lists,” said study author Gurit Birnbaum, PhD, a psychology professor at Reichman University in Israel. “It’s not height or ambition that makes someone fall for you, it’s your entire story. But people can’t feel that from bullet points.”
To test this idea, the psychologists conducted three separate studies involving single participants. In each study, participants viewed dating profiles that were deliberately manipulated to feature either narrative self‑presentation or nonnarrative self‑presentation.
After reading the profiles, participants rated how much empathy they felt toward the person and how interested they were in pursuing a romantic connection.
Across all studies, narrative profiles consistently outperformed nonnarrative ones. Participants reported feeling more empathy toward individuals who shared their experiences through stories—and that empathy, in turn, increased romantic interest.
Statistical analysis also showed that empathy mediated the relationship between storytelling and attraction, meaning it played a key role in why narrative profiles were more successful.
The findings mirror earlier research in marketing psychology, where narratives are known to influence consumer desire and decision‑making by fostering emotional engagement. The authors suggest a similar process occurs in dating, with empathy motivating people to want to connect and build relationships.
Importantly, the researchers stress that storytelling does not require exaggeration or fabrication. Instead, even everyday moments—when framed as part of a lived experience—can make a profile more compelling than a simple checklist of interests.
“By humanizing profiles and encouraging genuine emotional engagement, storytelling actively counters the objectifying nature of online dating platforms,” Birnbaum said
“It can motivate date seekers to view potential dates as fellow human beings rather than mere commodities and foster a sense of connection in an otherwise detached medium of online dating.”
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Reference
Birnbaum, G. E., & Zholtack, K. (2026). Once upon a swipe: The impact of storytelling on dating profile appeal. Psychology of Popular Media. https://doi.org/10.1037/ppm0000661
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